“What happened to the Bench Mob?”
“What’s going on with the Bench Mob?”
“Haven’t seen any posts lately, what’s up?”
“Are you dead?”
These are all things that have been said to me or asked over the past two months. There are a lot more I could add to that list, all of which are valid.
I have no issues with being real with you all, shit went off the rails with this project…
*Stephen A. Smith Voice*
The gap in writing is on me. It starts and ends with your boy and I take full ownership of that.
This is my explanation, and get ready folks because it’s not a good one.
I think the best way for this all to make sense is to go back to WHY I started BBM in the first place… I started the site the night before my 24th birthday back in October. I started this site because it’s always something I wanted to take a crack at. That’s as true as it gets.
But… There was some other stuff.
To put it simply, and save you a pathetic narrative… I felt some stuff and close people slipping away from me. It was something I should have known better the second time around and again, that’s on me. So I was faced with a choice to take what was inevitably going to hit me and become this ridiculous mess of a human OR take what was inevitably going to hit me and have something that I can lean on and be proud of.
I chose the latter. That is this site. It worked (for the most part) when it came to being something for me to lean on.
We hit the ground RUNNING, it was awesome. The amount of support was overwhelming to start out but it did come at a cost for advertising on Facebook. I know that the Facebook Ads helped our numbers but being a broke college grad couldn’t sustain that. Understandable.
I then did what all people must do and take what’s being called these days as a “real person job”
I took a marketing job and got right to work. I told myself “It’ll be fine! You can manage it! Stay up late! Blah blah blah!”
I then found myself making excuses, getting overwhelmed with my shit at work, and neglecting the one thing that kept me afloat when shit got out of control. I made so many excuses as to why I couldn’t right and I knew they were bullshit from Jump Street. But, I think we’ve all been there before when we know that we can be doing things totally different, yet we are so set in our ways that we make excuses.
So here we are… A long time since the last real sports post and it dawned on me as I write this while the Celtics play the Lakers in LA…
I just need to get back to doing it. Stop talking about it, stop making the excuses, and do it. A lot of things are going wrong right now in the world right now… You know what’s going right in this chaotic, ridiculous, shitstorm world?
It’s good to be back. Time to build.